Sean Bossinger’s Doings

I was talking to a friend of mine this morning, namely , about how much effort one should expend to keep in contact with a friend.  I am odd when it comes to friends - always have been.  I don't have very many, but those that I do have, I try to keep.  Why?  Because it takes too much time and effort to make new ones.  AND I happen to think that those people I consider to be friends are truly interesting people.

I don't send Christmas greetings outside of my family, and I don't really take the time to write handwritten letters (though I do have some expensive equipment with which to do this, and do, occasionally, extend this courtesy to my friends).  But I do try to stay in touch through e-mail with most of my friends.  Or at least on IM when I see people log in.

This post results from a conversation I had with myself this morning (yes, I do talk to myself - but I don't answer myself - yet), followed by one with the aforementioned friend, , which followed on the heels of a thought I had this morning about giving up on trying to contact a mutual friend of ours.  What bothered me most is not that she hasn't tried to contact me recently; but that I had the thought that it's almost reached a point where I'm willing to give up making further attempts.  Yes, I have “only” e-mailed, but when the last phone call I made cost about $80, that's something I cannot afford.

I understand that people change… and when they grow up, or move away, or change to a point that they no longer hold interest in maintaining that contact, then there's really nothing that anyone other than they can do to change the situation.  But this particular person thrives (or at least thriveD) on contact with their friends, and I suspect they still do.  Which leads me to conclude that friendship is no longer desired.

And that's a rather bitter pill to swallow.